Tuesday 24 April 2012

Lost in translation...lost in space...


Me and Paul took a taxi further up the mountains an hour away to the Rotung Pass. The snow or should I say 'powder' as all these 'snowboard dudes' call it here was fresh and deep. Apparently snowboarders and skiers come from all around he world to sample this kind of 'powder'?
Paul did a paraglyde for 7 Min's and zorbed down the hills.Fuck that. I opted for a cable car ride to admire the stunning views and sat and had a cup of chai on op of the mountain. Later on we hired some fishing rods and jumped on a local bus further down the River Beas to a fishing spot a local recommended to us. After 2 casts my line got caught on a rock and I realised there were no spare hooks in the tackle box. Great. Radio1 live lounge on the Ipod it is then.
Paul headed further up stream whilst I got hassled by a few Indian holidaymakers for photographs with them.I was seeing flashes the amount of photos they were taking. Snap!Snap!Snap!After 10 min of this my patience was running thin and I was in the mood to tell them to 'fuck off!' But I bit my lip. If I have learnt anything in India, one important thing is to keep my mouth shut and keep my opinions to myself. Yes, really.ha ha. I think I'm growing up!
The crowd finally dispersed and the heavens opened. It was teeming with rain and the sun was blocked by all the massive rain clouds.I'm shivering now and cursing the rod.I jumped under the nearest big rock for shelter, put on my ipod and rolled a joint. Half an hour passed, Paul returned drenched with a trout the size of a gold fish and we jumped on a bus to Vashist, another village close to Manali to organise a trek.
The trek takes three days, climbing 6000ft to the top of the mountain in snow boots and the 1980's scouse fluro ski suits they provide, camping over night -03 degrees, learning to snowboard the next day, camping again in the freezing cold, then the last day snowboarding to the bottom. No way am I doing that. I can't snowboard or ski and I don't fancy the idea of sleeping on a freezing cold, flat tent floor, climbing 6000ft,getting mountain sickness and wearing a fluro ski suit for 2 nights. Paul goes off to buy a shit load of chocolate for his journey and I move to the village of Vashist for a change of scenery.
Vashist is an old Tibetan town with lots of wooden houses with slate roofs,lots of wells,goats,yaks,cows,farms,cow shit, hippies, cheap accommodation, hot springs,temples, Tibetan restaurants,weird people and has some of the best views of the Himalayas in India.
I meet a local Tibetan guy who gives me a room in an old, wooden, Tibetan house in the middle of a farm in the local village. We have hot running water 24 hours because the water is pumped straight from the hot springs to here. I'm at the top of the house with a wooden balcony and stunning views across the Himalayas. It is amazing.
I went to the hot springs today which was a bit weird. Set inside the temple garden is men and women separate baths. You go down the stairs and go into a massive outdoor stone room which has a small stone pool steaming with spring water and showers pumping out spring water. All the Indians and Tibetans are in the showers naked washing themselves, their children and a weeks worth of washing. I really did'nt want to get naked in front of all these random strangers so I sneaked back outside and went and drank chai at our local tea shop.
Later that day I met some weird, wacky hippies,spongers,gypsies,travellers who told some tales whilst sipping chai and smoking charras.
White lad, young fresh face,sounds like a posh southerner, looks like Harry Potter  without the specs walks into the tea shop wearing what looks like a carpet with a hole cut out for his head and carrying a wooden flute. Nearly all travellers in India carry an odd instrument from triangles, to xylophones, to fiddles and bongo drums whatever, it pisses me off. It's like you're not a 'real' traveller unless you have some annoying instrument. Anyways, this guy doesn't even introduce himself when he sits down to join us he just announces, '' I had a dream last night ,that I was sat on top of a mountain playing the flute. So today for the first time in my life I bought a flute and guess what? I can play!''
Randomly he  starts belting out the theme tune to Lord of the rings and I keep telling myself ''don't laugh, don't laugh Paula. Be nice!' He finishes, there is along silence then we all start to clap. It's moments like this that I think, only in India. Incredible India.  The conversation is flowing and I am not listening properly to the weird stuff going on around me I am thinking of home, going back to Oz, work, friends and my family when I'm brought back into the conversation by Harry Potter announcing  ''I have seen some amazing puppies in Vashist.''
 I spit out my tea laughing, as earlier on, me and Irish had seen an Indian guy in a t-shirt saying 'I like puppies.' We both thought the same thing and burst out laughing.We know he means dogs but it's still funny.And it does not help when he then follows it on by saying, ''Some of them are so cute!'' Nobody is laughing, Harry looks a bit upset and we have to explain our childish reason for laughing so he knows we were not laughing at him,for fucks sake!
As the hours tick by more dread locked beasts join the table talking about religion, Buddhism, politics, freeing Tibet and all things that I cannot converse about because I ain't got a clue. I do try to get involved but there's no point I don't know what their talking about.So I just switch off and learn how to play 'shit head' with a group of 'normal looking' Irish lads for the millionth time in my life. I forget card games after a few games, I'm useless with cards.No memory whatsoever when it comes to card games and jokes. I do not know one good joke. I always forget them. Every Indian I meet asks me to tell them a joke. I must learn a few.
Today is a new day so I got up early and decided to take a stroll through the mountains as the weather was perfect.Clear blue sky, nice cool mountain breeze and the warm sun. Along the way I met a young Indian lad, age 24 with a glass eye. I couldn't talk to him properly cause I kept looking at his eye when I looked him in the eyes. Anyways, one eyed willie aka Shiva was a coffee shop owner and was out foraging for fresh tea and herbs so I went with him picking up litter along the way(good karma) and chatting about what all Indian's love to chat about.  A million questions why I am single?Why I have no kids  and why am I not married?...bla bla bla...
We stop at an old temple and one eyed willie pays his respects whilst I go and sit next to a baba. A baba is a man in India who dedicates his life to the gods, wears an orange robe, dreadlocks, more than likely carries a stick and a metal tiffin box for food. This dude looks like the above and is about 70 years old smoking a joint. People give the 'baba's' money donations, food, cigarettes and accommodation. These guys are sorted. They travel from place to place, sleep in a cave, in the hills, wherever they can, live free, and have a small bag of belongings. I think it would be a good life- as long as there is always a river close by to get a wash and lots of generous tourists! I sat and listened to his prayers, made small chit chat and gave him a cigarette. This baba was real, he wasn't a fake, some are fake and do it to make money .They then go home to a nice house and family at the end of the day. Just when it all seemed to good to be true the old bastard grabs my ass. I smack his hand and then he moves onto my thigh.Bastard! I knew it. I should have known, sitting out here in the forest waiting for a random lone traveller. Well,that's it, I'm off. Old fucker.I smack his hand again calling him a dirty old bastard under my breath. I pay my respects at the temple and apologise to the gods  for swearing and then head back to Vashist.
It's really has been a strange day. On the way back to the village I get talking to two Indian guys 24 and 39.They are on holiday here and want to know why backpackers they have tried to approach are rude and tell them to go away. I assure them we are not all like that and then have to accept the invite of a cuppa chai. I go back to their room they are renting and sit on the floor. I thought we were going to a cafe. It's all a bit awkward, they are pumping questions at me and I wish I had not come. I calm them down talking about my family and life so they can't get any questions in and one of the guys bring in 4 cups of coffee. I am so paranoid I grab my own cup thinking 'what if they have drugged me' haha. Funny the things you think sometimes. The youngest lad who tells me he exports gems and diamonds pulls out a guitar.Hindu hymns are being sung and played and they make me learn a few hymns. I'm sure these guys are going to try and make me take some gems or buy stones.You always read about these scammers. I try to think positive, sometimes well most of the time there is always an ulterior motive. This time I actually think these guys are genuine and really do just want to socialise and drink tea with good company.I end up sitting their for 4 hours chatting,singing and drinking chai but and I need to leave I still can relax.I make up a story, I have to meet a mate and they ask me to come back at 8pm for dinner. I say maybe but they insist. I go home get a shower and have another cup of tea.It's 7.30pm and I really can't be bothered going but I feel I have to or I will feel bad. I knock at the door and there is about 10 Indian men all sitting on the floor. I sit down, all eyes are on me, it's quiet, the TV has been turned off and I cross my fingers and lie, ''I'm sorry I cannot make dinner, my male friend has arrived and I have to spend time with him.I will see you all tomorrow.'' I quickly jump up and they are asking what time? Where?Breakfast?Lunch?'' I tell them I don't know and dash off. Sod that. I felt so uncomfortable and paranoid. There were too many men who didn't speak English and me. I wouldn't want the land lady to think I'm I....Oh I dunno I just did not feel comfortable.Maybe the joints I had earlier that afternoon had something to do with that paranoid moment! I headed to our local tea shop 'shanti,shanti' and ordered a cup of chai.I'm going to miss chai so much in Oz. They're all here tonight, Harry Potter, a London serial squatter ,one eyed willie, a Mexican who looks like Aladdin with the biggest head I have ever seen, three stoned Korean girls who are drooling over Aladdin and a Russian chick. Russians are always a bit crazy.I haven't med a calm or 'normal' Russian ever. This girl was chilled out and cool. We had a few smokes together and went to get some dinner.She took her hat off  at dinner and I nearly choked on my samosa. She has a skinhead with a dread locked multicoloured Mohawk, looked cool though. We exchanged travel tales whilst getting strange looks off the Indians and I gave her my hard drive to borrow so she can copy my movies. She better not do a runner tomorrow or her dread locked Mohecan has had it!
I'm off for another cup of tea and a smoke then its bed time for me.
I AM ABSOLUTELY LOVING INDIA RIGHT NOW. What a beautiful place it is up in the Himalayan Mountains. Bliss.....................................................................................................................

Friday 20 April 2012

Heading into the hills with winter chills..


We headed to the hill station of Missouri by private jeep courtesy of Sally and Steve. It’s so nice not using public transport although the 5 hour drive was terrifying. Lots of bends and twists up massive mountain sides speeding past buses and lorries. At one point a massive coach came whizzing around the corner and we had to swerve to avoid it. We were inches away from the edge, 4000 ft up and even Steve admitted he was a bit scared! After a death defying journey we arrive in the hill station of Missouri.
It looked like a British seaside town without the seaside. The tiny town was filled with little tea shops, cake shops, penny arcades,candy floss stalls, souvenir shops and Steve's favourite, MAGIC SHOPS! People on every corner selling home made sweets, food and the smell of fresh BBQ corn on the cob lingered in the air.
Steve loves any kind of magic trick and set off into the town with his coin trick to impress the local magic hawkers. We must have walked round for hours whilst Steve bought, tried, and tested his magic tricks. He has a smile on his face every day but this day his smile was much bigger, he was like a kid in a sweet shop.The Indian magicians loved him and his magic habit!
We drank lots of chai, went up the cable car and did what we do best-ate lots of local delights. Headed back to the hotel with a few bottles of red we found earlier on and met a young Irish lad, Paul, 22 from Dublin, Ireland but lives in Sydney. We sat up till the wee hours talking whilst Steve entertained us with his new magic tricks. He showed me a coin trick and everyone knew how to do it except me and Paul. Every time I tried and thought I had it I never. It was getting frustrating and he finally showed me the secret after an hour of me failing miserably whilst everyone laughed and couldn't believe I couldn't figure it out. I have practised this trick over and over and am really looking forward to driving Felon round the bend with it when I'm back in Oz as she will never get it! Just like me! Marty on the other hand I'm sure will get it but if not I'm sure he will Google the trick and find out the secret! haha Mr.Google.
We spent the next day walking around the town and I decided to leave the Douglas's 3 days early and continue higher up North with Paul. I am quite glad I chose to leave earlier unplanned as I was counting down the days till me and Sorcha would say goodbye and it was better this way as I never had enough time to dwell on our parting! I had only been with Sally, Steve and Kiera for a couple of weeks but I even thought leaving them and saying goodbye would be tough too.
The last few weeks have been amazing travelling with such a close, connected, happy family and even though my mum and dad are better off separated I really wish I could share this quality time with my family all together. I wish we were all not so far away living in separate countries, with separate lives and even though I had the best time it made me feel a little bit sad wishing I was travelling with my mum and dad and not someone Else's. Although, that would never happen! My mum would hate India, her idea of a holiday is an all inc resort for a fortnight with all the home comforts! I wouldn’t even think of bringing her to India! My dad on the other hand would love everything about it except the heat. But no, it's been brilliant and I am so glad I got to experience India with my 'second family' and good friends. When I do finally settle down I am going to model my family on the Douglas's and make sure we are as close as them. Sally and Steve have taught me more in 4 years than I learnt growing up in 20 odd years, they really are an inspiration.
We said our goodbyes which was not so bad as we are all moving on with our next adventure and me and Paul jumped on the local dirty, rickety, packed bus for a couple of hours drive back down the windy, curvy death defying hill road.
An hour after being on the bus my stomach is grumbling, I have a hot sweat and I know this feeling to well, being in India, if I don't get to the toilet now I will poo my pants! I've known Paul 5 min and have to swallow my shame and tell him in a panic 'If we don't stop this bus I'm going to shit my pants!' I squeeze past all the Indian men who are standing and sitting in the isle and whilst waving toilet paper in my hand shout to the driver 'toilet please! Stop! Toilet, toilet, toilet!'
Good enough he stops around a bend in a few minutes. I am running left and right like a headless chicken looking for somewhere to squat where the 50 odd Indian eyes that are staring at me off the bus can't see! I see a sort of cave and run inside. I cant see properly as it's dark but there are a few people in the cave.  shouting quickly toilet, toilet but they don't answer me. I run back out the what I think was a homeless persons cave and squat behind what looks like a closed chai mans tea stall. The buses engine has been turned off by now and the bus can see my head popping above the chai counter. All eyes are on me(they can only see my head)and I can hear Paul cracking up laughing. The noise is loud as my bum is exploding whatever dodgy food I ate out and a few people at the front of the bus can hear I'm sure!But I couldn't care, it's better this than shitting my leggings!Finally after a few minutes the deed is done , I'm back on the bus relieved and can't thank the driver enough for stopping! Paul is still laughing hard and can' get the picture of me running down the bus like a mad woman screaming 'Toilet!Toilet!' out of his head for the rest of the journey.
We arrive  in Dehadrun for our connecting bus to Shimla at 8pm and are told our next 10 hour overnight bus is not due till midnight.I am starving but dare not to eat in case my stomach plays up again.We attract a crowd of intrigued Indians as you always do at any bus station and answer all their questions of where are we from,what do we do and how we like India.I always lie and tell them it's my favourite country on earth and say how much I don't want to leave. I like S.E Asia a hell of a lot more than India but I will never say that to them! All Indian's I meet are shocked to hear I am not married with no children at 30 years old to to save any confusion, long boring conversations and marriage proposals I am now married to a yoga instructor,who is training in Goa and he is Australian.We may have children next year.
An lady of about 50 wearing Harry potter thick lenses glasses comes and sits with us and from the minute she sits down and starts talking the little English she knows we realise she has a screw loose.She is a really nice,happy chatty,weird,crazy old lady and her smile widens when I tell her me and Paul are not married and he is single.I buy her a drink and we all sit and chat about India and where we have been. The group of young Indian college lads are getting fed up of her talking and move away and the station police comes over and taps her with his wooden stick and starts shouting at her.Paul jumps up and protects her and says there is no problem she can sit with us.She looks so happy bless.Her Irish night in shining armour!
The bus arrives at midnight packed full of people?!Why are we waiting for a bus that is already full?!We are told the next bus is at 6am so we decide to sleep at the station. The guard tells us there is a dormitory upstairs a dollar a bed. I have never seen beds at a bus station so we head upstairs to investigate. There is a massive room with about 50 beds, it stinks of sweat, curry, stale milk and cheese. I’d say 30 of the 50 people were snoring-my biggest hate and I would rather sleep downstairs on the floor! He shows us a private room for an extra dollar with a toilet. We take the room and drift in and out of sleep for the next 5 hours.
The bus arrives half an hour early, quickly fills up and we pop a sleeping pill that Paul had from a friend in Australia. We fall asleep for 3 hours immediately and are woken for a tea and curry stop. I jump off and get a tea and my body feels stoned, my legs are spongy and I feel like I'm walking on the moon! Paul runs to the fruit man and buys a pineapple. I have no idea how he plans on eating it on the bus?
10 hours pass and we have arrived in Shimla hill station 2300ft safe and sound. The bus journey felt like it was 5hours long not 10. I pass Paul his pineapple when we get off the bus and he looks at me weirdly. He can’t even remember buying the pineapple! Ha, ha he must have been that doped up on the sleeping tablets he cannot even remember the transaction!
Shimla is a lot like Missouri only there were heaps more mountains around and we were higher up. We went for a walk into the village and met the ex-mayor of Shimla who took us to her house, introduced us to the family, made us tea and made us feel at home. Paul played cricket with the kids whilst I got stung by nettles trying to snap some photographs.
There was nothing much to do in Shimla so we decided to head to Manali. There was no way I was getting the shits on this bus so we paid  12$, our 3 day food budget for one dominoes cheese and pepperoni pizza to share. The base was thick and soggy, it was dripping in grease and I felt like a bloated whale after eating it. Paul is a chocoholic. He eats about six bars a day and after the pizza he ate, dairy milk, 3 ferreo rocher, a milky bar, a caramel crunchy and something else. I am trying to be healthy, I hardly ever eat chocolate but when you are travelling with someone who keeps pulling a bar out of their pockets every hour, it’s hard to say no to a piece!!!        
It took 12 long hours to reach Manali on a bus filled with Tibetan monks. He journey felt like it took forever, it was too noisy to sleep with the screeching of the brakes, rocky roads and snoring monks. When we got off the bus at 6am though the journey was worth it!
10 degrees, crisp cold mountain air, fog blowing out of our mouths, hot chai stalls billowing steam out the kettle and the sun rising above the snow covered Himalayan mountains. A herd of yaks run past us with a Tibetan farmer wrapped up in a handmade blanket and a woolly Nike hat. Yaks are funny looking creatures and look like a cross between a sheep and a goat with cute monkey eyes. There are ladies in the village outside weaving blankets, washing clothes and making tea.
We find a nice guest house run by a local man in the village. Hot water 24hrs a day which is very rare in India, nice shower, balcony views of the Himalayas, a clean room, big bed and warm blankets all for $3 each! Bargain.
We have spent the last few days exploring the villages and hills, country walks, taking photographs, drinking lots of herbal tea, eating Tibetan momo’s, Manali fresh river trout, thupka- Tibetan soup and breathing in fresh mountain air. Manali has the Beas river flowing through the centre of the valley, hot springs, apple, pear and peach orchards, mountains, hills, waterfalls and amazing views. Everywhere you look there is a photo opportunity it is a magical place. He homemade 8% apple cider is a sweet tasty treat as are the peach, pear and apple wines!
I remember being 18 in Amsterdam and smoking Manali weed. Well this is the place it is grown. It is the 2nd best hash in the world and there are weed fields everywhere you look. I thought it would be rude not to sample some of the local delights whilst here so I headed to the local chill out cafe to see what the go was. The Bob Marley lookalike barman told me to head to the local wool shop and ask for a guy called ‘crazy’. Found the wool shop, introduced myself to crazy and told him I wanted to buy a pink woolly hat he had on show and some of his finest hash. A joint later and I’ve bought a new hat and 10g of Manali’s finest cream hash.
We head back to the river bar, order some chai and I make the biggest joint known to man. I did give up smoking the 29th March so I can be 3 months clean so I can go back to he mines and pass my drugs test but after speaking to a few stoners 3 months is not needed only 40 days so I now have another month to indulge and what better place!Manali.
The next few nights are spent listening to music,talking each others ears off and smoking what has to be the strongest, nicest smoke I had ever smoked.We take country walks in the day, visit the local villages and Paul tried his hand at paragliding.
The scenery here is some of the best I have seen in India, the spring temperature in the day is perfect as is the winter chill at night.I am going to hang around here for a while and try some Tibetan cooking classes and learn how to make my favourite delight 'Momo's' (a Tibetan steamed dumpling filled with veggies or chicken served with chili and soy sauce), do some trout fishing and maybe treat myself to a helicopter ride over the Himalayas!



Wednesday 11 April 2012

The Douglas family arrive!!!

Left it a bit too long again to update the blog so here is the last 3 weeks..
After an hour searching for the English bar in Chennai called '10 Downing Street' we finally discovered it at 9.30pm. It looked like an English pub from the outside and suprisingly from the inside too! The bar men did not look English though.The Indian bar men were dressed in  70's clothes, with big scouse afro wigs and looked like Del boy trotter. The menu was well overpriced but we though fuck the budget let's treat ourselves!
We got talking to a couple of bankers who lived in Chennai. One was an Indian and one was a Kiwi.Before we knew it the bar was closing at 11.30pm and the guys asked did we want to carry on drinking.Hell yeah we did!They bought a bottle of vodka and a bottle of tequila and we left in from what I can remember a posh car with leather interior and chelsea pillows? We arrived at a block of posh apartments and realised that there was no bar it was a 'house party' A house party with us four.
A roulette table was pulled out with shot glasses and we decided to play 'shots roulette'.From what I can remember the roulette wheel never even got spun we just started necking shots.I returned from the bathroom to Sorcha thinking she was in the bathroom vomitting on the suede sofa.I cleaned her and the sofa up and returned to the lounge.A bit of a blur from this moment on...I remember the Kiwi and I kissing and then I woke up.
An hours tuk tuk back to our hotel in the blistering heat felt like hell and on returning to the shit hole we discovered the power was out.In the morning we decided to get a tuk tuk to the nearest air conditioned mall seeing as we were in the city and cool down.
K.F.C was the first thing we seen and a massive meal of shitty food was ordered of which we could only stomach a chicken burger!
Next day we felt a lot better and decided to head back the mall again and treat ourselves to hair cuts and colours.It was the same price as Oz but took 6 hours!!!6 hours in a hairdressers.I was so agitated and the clock seemed to stop.Finally after what felt like 12 hours we were on our way o the airport to fly to Delhi to meet Sally, Steve and Kiera- Sorcha's parents and younger sister.
Was very weird,amazing and exciting seeing the family in the morning and they brought us some lindt easter eggs,my long awaited Lorna Jane Yoga leggings and cuddles.
Next day we got on a plane to Dehadrun, Rishakesh to start our 2 week adventure.
Lots of yoga,family dinners,exploring,laughs and jokes filled the first week.
I decided seeing as I have applied to do a vipassana/mediation course that I would do an hours mediation class with Sally.The course I'm doing will be 14 hours per day mediation for 10 days so an hours class is nothing-I thought!
Bloody hell!I sat in the lotus position(legs folded,back straight,chest up,hands on knees)and after 5 min I was in agony.The meditation yogi master is telling us how to breathe and chanting 'om' and I just feel like I want to shake my whole body and wave my arms. I don't mind not talking it's the keeping still that's killing me!An hour passes which felt like 10 hours and I did not enjoy it or feel 'enlightened' at all.
I'm going to try and do a few more different styles of meditation before I give up on the whole thing but if every meditation feels like that I will not be taking part.
I'm discovering there is a whole world of things I don't know about through the help of Sally, research and talking to different people.
Crystal healing, stones, mediation, yoga, chakras ... there is so much interesting things to learn about here.I'm loving it.
I've gone off Indian food a bit and have been eating lots of Israeli food which is delicious and a lot more healthier.
We decided to take a trip to Corbett National Park to spot one of the 127 wild tigers there.Sally and Steve hired a jeep and a private driver and we drove 8 hours to the park.We stayed in big tents in the peaceful countryside and ate amazing Indian food.
We had to wait a couple of days before we could get a permit to the park and in that time met a guy from England called Dean.I don't really write about many people I meet as there is nothing much really to write about them but this guy definately deserves the air time.
He is 30 odd years old and had cycled all the way from Darlington, Uk to India! Crazy hey?! his backpack,tent and belongings are all on his bike and it took him 7 months to get to India passing through Iran, Turkey... you name it. He had to catch one plane somewhere along the way and it was the first plane journey he had ever took in his whole life!
The trip to Corbett National park was good. We never seen any tigers but we did see deer, lots of birds and peacocks. We also seen a few tiger prints and claw marks.
We are back in Rishakesh now awaiting our next journey to Mussori which is aparantly India's magic city.There are lots of magic shops and magicians which Steve is getting mega excited about as he loves a good magic trick! It's funny he keeps pulling out card tricks and coin tricks for the Indians and they love it!Hahah